Everyone has a role in nurturing children to help them grow and flourish. Whether you are a parent, their koro, one of the aunties or a friend of the family you can:
• give children lots of positive messages about themselves
• give them cuddles and hugs and tell them you love them
• take an interest in their lives, ask them how they feel and what they think
• praise their grown-up behaviour
• treat mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow
• have lots of fun together
• ignore most silliness (provided no one is being hurt)
• be clear and firm about behaviour that is beyond the bounds
• ask for their thoughts and ideas in family decisions
• keep consequences for unacceptable behaviour consistent and fair
• try hard never to hit or smack
• be a model for the behaviour you expect
• seek help for your family and whānau when needed.
No one can nurture children if they are struggling alone without support. Parents and caregivers need to be nurtured, too. This helps build strong families and communities if grandparents, friends and whānau look after parents. Give them lots of encouragement and the opportunities for a break.
Fathers and mothers are both important in children’s lives. Both need to spend time with the children and help guide their development. Even when parents live apart, it’s important to find a way to work together to nurture the children.
Grandparents also play a big part in children’s lives. Check out the help available from support groups and associations such as Grandparents raising Grandchildren and the Family and Foster Care Federation.
Even if you don’t have the day-to-day care of a child, you may be the person that children come to if they don’t feel safe. If you see behaviour that you don’t think is safe for children and other family members you need to help your family. See >>Hot topics: What is child abuse?
There is a lot to raising healthy, happy and confident children. No one knows it all, and strong and effective parenting doesn’t happen by magic. Encourage parents to:
• learn about the ages and stages of how children grow and develop
• learn ideas and skills in a parenting course
• make a pact not to smack
• build a strong bond with the children’s schools
• get help to end a violent relationship.
No one can nurture children if they are being hurt or abused themselves. Step in and get help if you know that there is violence, alcohol or drug abuse, or serious illness that is damaging the family and preventing your mokopuna, nieces or nephews from flourishing in a safe and happy environment. |
